Gellibrand Blues and Blueberry Festival

It is not my place or role to nag or convince any human being to do something just because I want them to.

Lily Buckland Femidist Grandaughter

Gellibrand Blues and Blueberry Festival

This year I went to the Gellibrand Blues and Blueberry Festival.

I like to keep things simple in like and brought one of the smallest caravans ever seen. Rod has a quirk of naming things and christened it Morrison, as in (Van) Morrison. Last year we chose a weekend escape to Gellibrand in Morrison with some special friends.

Looking at a map we decided it was a half way mark for our friends from the Eastern suburbs of Melbourne and us to meet. We loved the relaxed feel of the place, the landscape and relatively short distance to travel. While there we noticed signs advertising the Gellibrand Blues and Blueberry Festival, which had just passed. Loving a good old blues band we all vowed to return next year on that date.

Preparing for Gellibrand

Last November our friends had driven all the way from Melbourne to visit. They are keepers. The mark of any true friends we have decided is one who is prepared to drive all the way down to our corner of the state. Contemplating the legs of a great red wine we confirmed our Gellibrand weekend.

When I reminded my dear sweet partner a few weeks ago of the weekend he said he was already committed to a family function in another town.

Has anyone watched a Fish Called Wanda?

Femidist is dissapointedThe scene where Otto shoots an empty safe and yells “DISSAPPOINTED!” came instantly to mind.


For those of you who don’t know the scene just know I was sad and disappointed but knew 100% he would need to stick to the family commitment.

Why did I “let” him go?

It is not my place or role to nag or convince any human being to do something just because I want them to. I think I was quite a nag in my first marriage and frankly it is tiring. Rod is a grown up in charge of his own life and decisions. He knows I was disappointed he would not join us but his other commitment was more important than an argument.

My experience

Over the years my children had many tears over weekends where their father did not meet their expectations for quality time. After we separated he had them ever second weekend for about 6 months but the moment a new woman entered the scene, his priorities changed and the children have suffered. He did not want to have them over. Time after time he was not available or worse still cancelled or broke off a catch up.

It got to the point where they simply stopped asking to have time with him, stopped inviting him to sports and school events. Another, “No. I am too busy” was too much to bear for them.

Don’t get me wrong, they love their Dad and have come to develop their own relationships with him now as adults. They do not forget however how his new wife was apparently more important to him than they were. They felt very unwelcome and unloved and hurt.

So when my beautiful partner reminded me he needed to be with one of his children for the weekend I did not protest. This to us is an incredibly important relationship. We discussed from the beginning the required external commitments and boundaries. I vowed I would never interfere with his special time with his own children which in itself is limited.

I am not seeking any accolades for this commitment to his family. We actually really like each other’s children a lot and we all get along. My point is that there are always complexities to any relationship and the price we pay is the inability to take holidays together. In five years we have had one week holiday together on a fantastic P&O cruise with friends. That is it. That makes our weekend mini breaks very important.

So I went along without him, disaapointed  but determined to have fun

I remembered my vow to promote his family time chose to get over my disappointment and went ahead and packed up for Gellibrand anyway. I took my eldest daughter Stacey and baby Lilyanna. We had an absolute ball. The music was in the actual caravan park which meant we could walk back and forth to the cabin for any needs. It was very relaxed and the weather was warm and sunny.

Lily loved it and she is turning out to be quite the social butterfly. She loved the music, lots of people, dogs to meet, dancing on her two chubby legs and meeting other little people.

Lilyanna enjoying the music

We sat around for about 7 hours in the sun, nibbling platters of cheese and biscuits and enjoying a few glasses of wine. Except for Stacey and Lily I hasten to add!

Gellibrand Blues

Market Day at Gellibrand Blues and Blueberry Festival

A second session was scheduled at the pub. However we left that to the more stoic diehards and we returned to our cabin totally relaxed and care free.

The next morning we enjoyed the market with lots of local produce and craft. Again the weather spoilt us with sunshine and blue skies. Returning home we felt relaxed and refreshed.

The Gellibrand Blues and Blueberry festival is a great blues music event. It is small in numbers, relaxed in dress code and cheap at $30 a head. Additionally, there was a BBQ, coffee van and drinks van on site or one could BYO.

I remain perplexed on the blueberry element however. While there were a few shrubs on sale at the Sunday market not another blueberry was to be found.


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